tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23038695547431177092024-03-05T18:34:04.457-08:00Team BrynnChristy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.comBlogger39125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-66742654055904456142013-10-23T16:33:00.002-07:002013-10-23T16:33:30.205-07:00Obituary<span><b>BRYNN <a href="http://www.blogger.com/null" name="LUNDB">LUND</a></b><br /> 1999 - 2013</span><br />
<img align="left" border="0" hspace="10" src="http://www.southlandfuneral.com/obituaries/Lundnewwebsite_153.jpg" vspace="10" width="150" /><span><br /> Despite a valiant and courageous battle with cancer, Brynn Joelle Lund, passed away with loving family by her side on Saturday, October 19, 2013 at the Rotary Flames House in Calgary at the tender age of 14 years. <br /> </span><br />
<span>Relatives and friends are invited to meet with the family at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Barnwell Chapel, Barnwell on Friday, October 25, 2013 between 7:00 P.M. and 8:00 P.M.<br /> The Funeral Service will be held at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Taber Stake Centre, 4709 - 50 Avenue, Taber, on Saturday, October 26, 2013 at 11:00 A.M. with Bishop Tyler Johnson conducting. Burial to follow at the Barnwell Cemetery.<br /> </span><br />
<span>Supported and strengthened throughout her journey by loving parents Kevin and Christy Lund, sisters Sadie and Reese, brother Kade and pets Zoe and Suri. Brynn will be anxiously waiting for her Great Grandma Ivy Lund, and will be forever loved by her Grandma Carma Anderson, Grandy Patty Lund and all of her aunts, uncles and cousins.<br /> </span><br />
<span>Brynn was predeceased by both of her Grandpas Ken Anderson and Darwin Lund.<br /> Always a considerate, mild, polite and obedient child of God, Brynn had a quiet confidence that allowed her to connect, inspire and change people’s lives for the better. She was able to do this at her school, community and church. Brynn did it at the hospitals in Calgary, Lethbridge and Taber where she would receive her treatments and care. Most importantly she brought her sweet spirit into our life and home that helped us to become an eternal family. Brynn was a natural peacemaker; she did not like contention or conflict and had a very innocent sense of humour, which made her everyone’s favourite sister. Brynn’s smile was infectious and her outward beauty was the same whether she had long hair, or a shiny bald head! She was so beautiful either way. <br /> </span><br />
<span>Brynn loved going to Barnwell School and missed it when she became sick. She excelled in school, always on the honour roll and loved English and Art the most. Brynn inherited her Grandpa Darwin’s ability to draw and create. She really enjoyed swimming, animals and babies. Brynn always wanted so many pets; we had dogs, cats, rabbits, fish and 4-H calves. She was so warm and kind that animals and babies were naturally drawn to her, and she loved every minute of it.<br /> </span><br />
<span>Brynn was diagnosed with cancer (Rhabdomyosarcoma) in July of 2010. She was a perfect example of enduring to the end. Brynn was continually asking for more and better treatment. Near the end of her life when her body could not take any more, she still would not quit and she never lost hope that she would beat her disease.<br /> </span><br />
<span>If friends so desire in lieu of flowers, memorial tributes in Brynn’s name may be made directly to the Alberta Children’s Hospital Foundation - Oncology Research, 2888 Shaganappi Trail NW, Calgary, Alberta T3B 6A8 (www.childrenshospital.ab.ca).<br /> </span><br />
<span>We would like to thank the community we live in for supporting Brynn. Your love for our family has strengthened us. You have shared not only our pain, but our love for Brynn. A special thanks to Dr. Lewis, Dr. Mala, Dr. Torrie, Primary Nurse JoJo, the Nurses and staff at the Oncology Unit and Clinic at The Children’s Hospital, Rotary Flames House, Taber and Lethbridge Hospitals and Ronald McDonald House. Your special care of our sweet girl, gave us three extra years with Brynn and you are part of our family now. </span><br />
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<span><span style="font-size: large;">WE LOVE YOU BRYNN<3 TEAM BRYNN FOREVER<3</span></span></div>
Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-20011576837734984242013-10-21T16:42:00.001-07:002013-10-21T16:42:43.282-07:00A Day to Honor Our Sweet BrynnBrynn Lund<br />
<br />
1999-2013<br />
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Brynn Joelle Lund, beloved daughter of Kevin and Christy Lund, and beloved sister of Sadie, Kade and Reese, passed away in Calgary on Saturday October 19, 2013 at the age of 14 years.<br />
Relatives and friends are invited to meet with the family at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Barnwell Chapel, on Friday, October 25, 2013 between 7:00 p.m. and 8:00 p.m.<br />
The Funeral Service will be held at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Taber Stake Centre, 4709-50 Avenue, Taber, on Saturday, October 26, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. with Bishop Tyler Johnson officiating. Burial to follow at the Barnwell Cemetery. Condolences may be forwarded by visiting our website at <a href="http://www.southlandfuneral.com/">www.southlandfuneral.com</a><br />
In lieu of flowers, memorial tributes in Brynn's name may be made directly to the Alberta Children's Hospital Foundation- Oncology Research.<br />
Arrangements in care of Southland Funeral Chapel, Taber.Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-65063820109842555672013-10-20T07:53:00.001-07:002013-10-20T07:53:45.569-07:00October 20, 2013 Our Sweet Angel BrynnOn October 19th, 2013 our sweet angelic Brynn went home to live with her Father in Heaven. This past week we had the privelage of sharing many tender moments with her. A couple of weeks ago I thought to myself- the only other day in October that I can think has any special meaning would be the 19th because that was my due date when I was expecting Brynn and then she came 2 weeks early! The days all run together and I never know what day of the week it is- let alone the actual date. A couple of days ago I told Kevin that and wouldn't that be strange if that was the day she went. We both thought there is no way that will happen- she's going to go longer than that. On the 18th things drastically changed with her. We were still giving her MANY baths a day because they helped with the pain in her back. Usually I could just have a hold of her arm and it was starting to take 2 of us to hold onto her getiing in the tub. The morning of the 18th she woke up and wanted to move to the lazyboy chair. Kevin and I had ahold of both arms when her legs completly buckled underneath her and she had no strength in her legs. She told us later that day that her legs were knumb. Her one eye where her lump was on her temple was sagging that day and she didn't seem to be using it and it would stay mostly shut. That evening her nose started bleeding out of the blue and they said it was probably the tumor in her head pressing on vessels. She had another meal of crab with her dad- the only thing she has been eating the entire week is crab legs and coke! We kept telling the doctors it was the 2 main food groups! We had a nice bath in the big tub with the nurses help and she would smile in complete relaxation. That night was the roughtest we had- Kevin and I were up with her until 5:30 or so and she was throwing up and not able to get it out. She was having a hard time breathing and it was extremely hard to watch. For the first time we didn't see death as the worst thing possible for her. Kevin told her that both her grandpas were waiting for her and that she had fought long and hard but she didn't need to fight anymore. We couldn't tell her enough how extremely proud we were of her and she has taught us so much. Brynn waited until everyone woke up the in morning. Her sister Sadie was able to hold her hand and spend some time with her. Suddenly her breathing changed and we were able to all be with her holding her hands- telling her how much we love her when she took her final breath. I couldn't believe it happened that quickly after thinking through the night that I really couldn't watch her suffer like that anymore. <br />
Kade had gone home the night before with my sister to play football and we felt so bad her wasn't there. We didn't want him to find out before we got home and could tell him. Packing up and driving home was so hard. I just felt numb and empty inside without her. I was going to type this last night but I layed on Brynn's bed and wept- trying to smell her on her pillow and hold on to her as tight as I can. We have been inseparable for the last 3 years. Last night I felt like I didn't know what to do with myself without taking temperatures, giving pills at exact times throughout the day, silencing beeping med pumps, and just caring for her in general. It's going to be a huge adjustment.<br />
Sadie is going to have an extremely hard time. "Sadie and Brynn" has been just one word since she was 2. The two of them have been inseparable and the best of friends. They had a special bond and it's going to be a lonely time for her. I know she will feel Brynn with her- there is no way that Brynn wouldn't continue being there for her as she always has been.<br />
I feel the need to pay special tribute to my husband Kevin. I don't think there is a more devoted and amazing dad out there. Kevin comes across as a tough guy, but Brynn had him wrapped around her little finger. He was so soft and gentle with her. He was her hero who would never give up and would do anything to make what she wanted happen. He would run to Red Lobster all the time for her but then started buying frozen crab. He would cook it every day and sit by her and shell it for her and feed it to her. She would always have a smile on her face and the doctors couldn't believe she was able to eat it! The last couple of weeks it was Daddy that Brynn would call out for. She wanted us both there with her but if Kevin was even in the next room she would call for him. She felt safe with him close by and he was truly her protector and hero. I will forever be grateful to him for his tender care with her. I will never wonder how he will be if I get sick because I know how nurturing he is and that he will always take care of his family.<br />
Brynn kept her sense of humor right to the end. She was calling the shots and when she asked for gravol and the nurse would say how about we wait for bed- she would quickly and politely say- could I please have it right now? She would bob her head to the music while she lay in the tub. The other day she was getting out of the tub and I asked where she wanted to move to? There were a couple different chairs or her bed that were options. She said could I go in the magenta chair? I burst out laughing- only Brynn would call the color of chair magenta! Everyone called her a sweetheart. We had all new nurses at the rotary flames house and they quickly came to love Brynn and say the same things the nurses at Unit one would say. She is so polite, such a sweetie, there is something about this girl that makes us just love her. Even when we thought she was sound asleep she would whisper a thank you when the nurses changed her med bag or fixed her beeping pump. Always so polite.<br />
Brynn truly has changed everyone she has met for good. She rubs off on anyone that comes in contact with her. She was such an easy child, so willing to help out, always likes things neat and tidy and didn't want any contention. I see know that she has always been our angel on earth and that was preparing for her to be our angel in heaven. I feel honored to be her mother and to have the privilege of having her in our family and home for 14 years. I'm so grateful for all the quality time alone we have spent together for the last 3 years that she has been sick. She has always been by my side and we enjoy doing so many similar things together. I will miss her more than I can explain and truly have a hole in my heart with her gone. I know she is running, swimming, with her dog Zoe and her two grandpas as well as many friends that have passed before her. I hope and pray that our family can continue feeling her presence with us. I know we will be together forever and am so grateful that she helped get our family to the temple. I love you Brynn. Families Are Forever<3<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com38tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-52134980594373802432013-10-13T23:48:00.000-07:002013-10-13T23:48:09.286-07:00October 14, 2013I know I just wrote a couple days ago but I'm trying to write more often especially to remember those small amazing moments that I'm afraid I'll forget! On Saturday we had a small but meaningful "tender mercy" happen here that just makes me remember that Heavenly Father is aware and cares about us whether it's big or small. I know that he answers prayers through other people alot of the time and we just need to recognize it and where our blessings are coming from. For the last week or so Brynn has been talking about getting her nails done and wanting gel polish on them. I thought we would do it for her birthday and last weekend we were home and I was going to take her to Lethbridge to get them done. She didn't feel the best and just wanted to get them done when we were back in Calgary and going on a pass. Little did we know that things would change to a point that we wouldn't be able to take her out on passes this week. She was asking nearly everyday about it and the doctors didn't think it was a good idea. They considered letting her go with a nurse assisting us on Thursday but she would have to be off her one pain med and they thought she might not be comfortable enough. She also ended up sleeping all day and was then disappointed when it was evening and too late to go. We then decided maybe someone could come and do them here. Brynn said that was fine even though she really wanted gel- but thats Brynn- just going along with things! They found someone from Ronald McDonald house and said she could come Saturday afternoon. I was happy but sad for Brynn that it wasn't exactly what she was hoping for. When the girl arrived I told her Brynn's favorite color was this light bluish green ( the color of her new room) and that I had polish that was similar. She said she had gel polish and her led light with her. I was excited and then she pulled out the exact color of gel that Brynn wanted! It sounds stupid but I just started crying! We went to the sunroom and the nurses had it all set up like a spa with music playing and everything. Brynn got to sit in a comfy lazy boy that is heated and is a massage chair. The girl gave her a fantastic 2 hour mani pedi and Brynn enjoyed every minute of it! She was so comfortable that she fell asleep! It was such a special afternoon for Brynn and anything that brings a smile to her face just warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes. I'm sure no one really new how much it meant to me that Brynn was able to have it done- but a loving Heavenly Father did and made sure that it happened and it was even better than taking her out. There are many sad and low points to our days but this was one high moment that helped us smile for a bit. Thanks to kind people that volunteer their time and talents to help someone they don't even know. I will be eternally grateful<3Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-70934688539331056652013-10-11T13:03:00.000-07:002013-10-11T21:54:57.991-07:00October 11, 2013Well, following Brynn's birthday the nights got harder at home- we were hardly sleeping at all and her pain was getting harder to control. We were spending alot of time on the phone with Calgary and increasing the fentanyl that she was on continuously. They decided we better come up on tuesday since she needed her port changed anyway and they would switch her from fentanyl to hydro morphine. They would do this for a couple of reasons. One is that there is a shortage of fentanyl right now and they were having a very hard time searching all of Calgary to find enough for us at home. We even had a pharmacist in Lethbridge that was kind enough to drive up Sunday night to Calgary and bring more back for us! The other reason is that she could be getting resistant to the fentanyl and therefore requiring more and more to get on top the pain. We drove up with the whole family and had one extra bag of fentanyl left. She was going through it pretty quick and I was prepared to change the IV bag on the way if we ran out but she was surprisingly pretty comfortable and we got to the hospital before her bag ran dry. Usually changing her port is a pretty quick process but lately with the steroids she is on its getting harder and harder for them to access her. They took her off her fentanyl and then it took quite a few attempts to access her so her pain was getting pretty bad. They switched her to the hydro morph and they were trying to figure out the dose she needed. That was one of the hardest days we have ever had. She was in so much pain the rest of the day and we were trying to catch up to it. It literally feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest when I have to watch her suffer and can do nothing but console as she endures. We got literally no sleep that night and each day since then has slowly got a bit better pain wise but she is definitely not doing well.<br />
It's probably a blessing that when we left on Tuesday to come up here that we assumed we would change meds and be back in a couple days for thanksgiving weekend. Yesterday as we talked with the doctors here at Rotary Flames house we asked about that possibility and was told that we were here to stay now. <br />
Last week when Brynn was having a very hard time mentally I had her write one blessing down at the end of each day. It was amazing to me how easy it was for her to come up with something even when she was having a hard time smiling. I have to remind myself of that and follow her example as I'm trying to not be mad that we aren't home with our family for thanksgiving weekend and counting all our blessings together. I know the Lord is blessing us with little miracles everyday. The big miracles that I'm asking for may not be the ones I'm receiving but I know he is aware. I feel very numb right now as we are in survival mode to get through each day. Yesterday I felt guilty that I hadn't cried yet that day and then I realized that I'm so aware of giving Brynn everything she desires right now. She asks constantly for us to not shed any tears and somehow I'm being blessed to be able to do that for her- in front of her. However this morning as I was in the shower I couldn't stop crying. It's the one place I can just uncontrollably sob- get it out and then try to get through another day. I'm realizing how precious our time is and am so grateful to have our family all together up here- even when Reese is driving us crazy! I feel her slipping away and it's impossible not to want to hold on as tight as I can- even though I know it's probably not the best thing for her. Sometimes I'm selfish like that.....I just love her way too much<3Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-2513881815756599572013-10-05T00:25:00.000-07:002013-10-05T00:34:22.911-07:00October 5, 2013 HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRYNN!!!I'm going to keep this post short and sweet- mostly because I can hardly keep my eyes open. I just tucked Brynn into her own bed- yes we got to bring her home again for the weekend! It's 12:30 a.m. and I want to be the first to wish this amazing girl a Happy 14th Birthday!!!! My heart is incredibly full as I wonder why I of all people was blessed to be her mother. She has taught me so much and I truly believe that she was sent to me for a specific purpose- to help me be a better person. We had some cake and opened a couple of presents a day early and then Brynn wanted to watch some home videos. We watched the day she was born and then a few more as she was a toddler and a little girl. I'm reminded again what a joy she is in our family and how she has made parenting her extremely easy! She has always been so quick to smile and make me laugh. She's got such a witty humor and charm about her that just makes everyone want to be around her. Most of all she is the sweetest, kindest girl I know. She is so sensitive to others feelings and she never requires much discipline. Just saying you were disappointed in her would make her go to her room and cry. I hope she knows how much we love her and look up to her. She is honestly my hero and has made such a huge impact on me and our family. <br />
This last week she had radiation on her head. It was a little scary watching them make the mask and I couldn't believe we were radiating a 4th area on her. Brynn met with us and the radiation doctor and she asked him if he could radiate her liver too. He was a little taken back as this hasn't been discussed but he said he would look into it for her. She never stops thinking of what else we can do and absolutely refuses to give up. Sometimes she gets upset with me because I'm not always sure that what she wants to do is the best thing. I don't want more side effects or to make her more uncomfortable and have the same outcome. It's the mother in me that wants to save her from any pain or suffering. She is so determined though and keeps us all continuing to hope and believe that there is something that can make a difference. Her pain has increased a bit but we are managing it with a pump and having it run constantly. She just called me and I rubbed her back for a bit so I'm going to finish before she needs me again. We hope to be home for a couple more days and then go back up to Calgary as a family again. So far we are still getting passes everyday as long as Brynn is feeling up for it. Her favorite place is Red Lobster and Kevin and I sit and crack open crab legs for her as she eats as much as they want. This week the manager came and told us that they had a staff meeting and they would pay for her to come whenever we can as often as we like. They had Kevin and I in tears. People are so amazing- almost everyday I'm taken back by the generosity of others. It has really taught me to be more empathetic in my life and look outside my own problems. <br />
Well time for bed- I never know what kind of night it's going to be and have to catch sleep when I can. I just have to say what an amazing girl we have- pushing on and continuing to fight no matter what they tell us. She is unbelievable and inspires me. Happy Birthday Brynn!!!!! You are my hero and have been our angel on earth since the day you were born. Love you<3<br />
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<span id="goog_1905273262"></span><span id="goog_1905273263"></span><br />Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-54710374941966556962013-09-29T23:08:00.004-07:002013-09-29T23:15:41.527-07:00September 29, 2013I know I keep saying we had a rough week and I'm sorry for the repetition but each week just seems to get tougher. Brynn had high hopes when we went back to Calgary last Monday that her liver function numbers would be improving as well as her bilirubin so that we could begin chemo. It was just another blow for her to find out that they were not getting better and chemo was still not an option. She woke up early Monday morning at 4am and called me and said she felt a bump on the side of her head- right on her left temple. I told her it was probably nothing to worry about even though I worry about everything. We showed them and they tried not to look to concerned because they know how Brynn worries. She's too perceptive though and she knew that it wasn't good. They told us that her last scans they had seen some lesions in the bones on that side of her head and that now they were probably growing. It is so disturbing to Brynn every time she looks in the mirror and is worrying about a lump that is visible and that she thinks is growing. <br />
We took all the kids out of school and brought them to Calgary with us. They said it would be a good idea. We were staying in the Oncology Unit (Unit 1) which has become a second home to us. They brought up again that it would be better for our family to be at Rotary Flames House. Three years ago Brynn asked me what that place was and I told her that is was for people that weren't getting better. It is also used for respite care and other things that I didn't know about. I wasn't worried at the time that we would ever be there or need to go there. How in the world was I to bring up going over there to Brynn without upsetting her? They didn't want us at Ronald McDonald House without nurses there and Unit One wasn't set up for families of 6 to stay there- even though they were bending over backwards for us and putting mats on the floor to accommodate us as best they can. The hospital was at 114% capacity and they really needed the beds if we could be somewhere else. Rotary Flames House only had one really large room for our family and they were holding it for us but couldn't do that indefinitely. They also mentioned that we could bring our dog Suri there to stay as well.. We had lots of reasons so it was discussed. Brynn didn't even want a tour of it and so the decision was made for her mostly by her doctors and nurses. It felt so yucky to walk over there with all our belongings- a place that I never wanted to set foot in but knew it was probably the best place to be. Her nurses were so incredible and bought matching sweaters with Brynn and they all wore them as we walked over to Rotary Flames House together. We love them and they are so good to us and Brynn!<br />
I was feeling very guilty the first night there and was ready to check back into unit one when Brynn said she hated it there and felt like she was kicked out of the hospital and forced to go there against her will. Her and I both hate change and would rather stay with what we know. By day two however we were feeling more comfortable there and could see the benefits there was with more space for our family and being able to come and go as we please with no passes. They have a chef there and he made a few of Brynn's favorites already- salmon and BBQ ribs with mashed potatoes. Brynn really enjoyed that!<br />
We really have tried to go out and do something fun each day as a family. We all went to build a bear which the kids loved. We went to Chucky Cheese and they played games, went to the mall and are hoping to go to the Science Center this week. We were surprised when Brynn said she was up for going home for the weekend. We got home last night about supper time. We had such an amazing surprise as the outside of our home was all decorated for fall and my sister and family surprised Sadie by completely redoing her room this week. It was so nice for her as we did Brynn's room this spring and our plan was to do hers this summer - but things have been crazy and it hasn't happened yet. Brynn went to church this morning and has been doing pretty good. We had friends bring her favorite thing- Cafe Rio tonight and Grandy brought her favorite strawberry pie. She started feeling sick a few hours ago and was throwing up and had a headache. We called and talked to Calgary but things have settled down and she is comfortable and watching Christmas movies with her sister Sadie. It's so nice to be home- but also we are more nervous to take care of her on our own. We are heading back tomorrow and have an appointment to talk to the radiation oncologist on Tuesday morning. They might do one or two treatments on Brynn's head to relieve the pressure and hopefully make the bump go down. It literally breaks my heart when she sees herself in the mirror and starts crying because the bump and her yellowish eyes bother her so much. She's as beautiful as always to us but I'm sure it would be distressing to me as well. We continue to pray for strength and comfort and for the doctors to be inspired to do the right thing with her care. We pray that we can get all the benefit we can from radiation and with as little side effects as possible. Brynn is still hoping for her liver counts to regulate and we are praying for that too. I was asked recently if there was still any hope. My reply was that there is always hope and we refuse to believe any different. You have to keep having hope- it's the only way you can get through each day. <br />
This coming Saturday- October 5th is our beautiful Brynn's 14th birthday. We pray that she can feel well and we can enjoy spending this special day with our incredible girl<3<3<3<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-23005388781371241732013-09-22T23:07:00.001-07:002013-09-22T23:07:42.716-07:00September 22, 2013We got to come home yesterday from the hospital after an emotionally exhausting week in Calgary. We went up to start chemo again on Tuesday and they discovered that her ALT and AST numbers were through the roof which shows your liver functions. They decided to do an ultrasound the next day and I went up to be there with them when we got the results. They were not good. There is a blockage coming from her liver and there is also inflammation of her pancreas. They put her on higher amounts of steroids and said we would watch her numbers but right now chemo is not an option. She is having abdominal pain because of the obstruction and it is making her jaundice. Her skin and her whites of her eyes are turning yellow and Brynn doesn't like how her cheeks get puffy being on the steroids. Calling her in and talking to her with the doctors was one of the hardest things we have done yet. She is so perceptive and she knew the news was not good. When they called us all into the room I just held her tight on my lap and prayed for the peace and comfort we would need. First Brynn was hysterical and saying- " Your just going to let me die???" But in true Brynn nature about an hour later she was calm and asking questions that a 13 year old girl should never have to ask. She blows me away! It was just like when I got the call when she was diagnosed and she was crying and asking about chemo and then she stopped and asked " Can I get a blonde wig?" and then went out to play on the trampoline while I watched out the window in tears. She teaches me so much by her example and she always has such a sweet spirit with her. I know that she is being blessed and comforted to be able to handle all that she can. We are doing are best to help her through everything and to keep hope that her numbers will come down to where they need to be to start chemo again. She is a figher and said tonight that all she wants for her birthday in two weeks is to be getthing chemo. As much as we try to do what we can for her- she is comforting and blessing us much more. We are heading back tomorrow (Monday) to Calgary and taking the whole family with us to enjoy spending time together. We will continue to have hope- even though the things we hope for are changing as our journey changes. I read a story of some people building wells in Africa and they had to carry trucks of supplies over the bridges. The bridge was only supposed to hold a certain weight and their load was twice the limit. They would bring extra lumber and reinforce the bridge and strengthen it so they could drive over it- then take their lumber with them and do the same thing with the next bridge. At the end of the story it said "In any heartbreak there is just so much hurt, so much pain, so much loneliness. Those are part of human experience and God does not always deaden them or take them away. But though He does not always lighten the load, He does reinforce the bridge."<br />
That is exactly how I'm feeling - My heart is aching and this is the hardest thing I can imagine..... but He is reinforcing our bridge.<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-24685519251178773112013-09-04T18:12:00.001-07:002013-09-04T18:16:01.494-07:00September 4, 2013Once again I have been thinking about posting on the blog for the last 2 weeks but couldn't make myself do it when I would actually find the time to sit down. First of all our trip to Connecticut was amazing! We flew into New York City and my brother only lives about an hour from the airport right on the border of New York and Connecticut. The flight there made me nervous as Brynn was having nerve pain down her right arm and I had to squeeze her elbow for alot of the flight. She discovered it helped to hold there I guess on a pressure point or something. I was a little teary because I was so nervous to be that far away- but Brynn insisted we were going no matter what so I was just constantly saying a prayer that things would work out. Amazingly they did!<br />
We did so many things that I really can't believe it now! We went shopping to a huge outlet mall, went to New York City and Time Square and even went and got her first pedicure all together!<br />
We went to the Broadway show Wicked and got to meet the cast after. Brynn was so excited to go backstage and they even took us on the stage! We went in the main actresses dressing rooms and even got to try on their tiaras! We went to the American Girl Store which has been on Brynn's list for a few years now. It was huge- 3 stories tall and she had so much fun there. I told her I would buy her an outfit for her doll there- then my brother did too and his in laws sent money with him to get something for Brynn as well. Of course Brynn felt guilty and didn't want to be spoiled (true Brynn) but I told her I think you deserve it! We enjoyed just hanging out at my brother's house with his outdoor pool and his golden retriever. I told him those two things are all Brynn needs to be happy! The end of the week we went to a Yankee game. We got to go early and go down on the field. The players started warming up and Derek Jeter was right in front of us! We were pretty excited when he came over to sign our stuff. He said "Nice hat" to Brynn. I asked if I could get a picture of them and he was happy to do it!<br />
We did so many things in the day- Brynn's nights were not good there. She would have alot of pain trying to lie down and her nerve pain in her arm was getting worse. I called Calgary a few times and we had to up her morphine while we were there. I wondered many times if we would make it the whole week and I can honestly say it is a miracle that we were able too! I know our prayers were answered and that Brynn was blessed to have that trip before things got worse.<br />
When we flew into Calgary coming home we were staying over night because she had an appointment the next morning. She was very excited they had a hot tub at the hotel because it felt good on her sore back. We went early in the morning to go to the hot tub and Brynn took one step on the carpeted stairs and her feet went out from under her. I've never heard her scream in pain that hard in my life and it scared me so bad! I didn't know if she would even be able to get up but in a few minutes she wanted to still go sit in the water and she said she was fine. We went to the appointment and they were a little concerned that something might be in her neck so we were already getting an MRI the next day and they said let's just see what it shows. Kevin came up with all the kids to see us and to be there for the MRI which was such a good thing. <br />
The next day was a hard one. We had her MRI and it took alot of pain medication to make Brynn comfortable enough to be able to lie flat on her back for the scan. It was hard watching her and knowing that they were probably going to find something we wouldn't like. It took her a long time in recovery to be able to wake up. We were waiting there with her when her nurse called my cell and said Dr. Lewis wanted Kevin and I to come meet with him. We left Brynn with Sadie and she was in tears because she wanted to come too. She hates it when we talk to the Dr without her but we told her this time it was necessary. The news from the scan were not what we expected at all- in fact the doctors were all surprised and said it was worse than they thought. There was a growth that was compressing her spinal cord and it could snap at any time which would leave her paralyzed. They said we needed to do emergency radiation that day. Usually it takes a while to do all the prep work for radiation but not today. We explained things to Brynn and then took her right over to Foothills where she had to do more scans to get her set up for radiation. They started the first treatment about an hour later. Usually they only do radiation Mon- Fri but they said we would be going right through the weekend. The poor girl was already having symptoms from her last radiation treatment from 2 weeks before and now we were doing the back of the neck which would effect her throat as well. <br />
The last 3 weeks have been the hardest both physically and emotionally for our sweet girl. I've never seen her so scared in her life and she's never had so much pain swallowing- even from her high dose chemo. She has not been able to eat or drink and has had to be on TPN which is all her nutrition and fat through IV. The doctors wanted to get her to our cabin because that's all Brynn said she wanted so they sent us home for the weekend and she woke up the next morning with a fever and we went by ambulance back to Calgary. Last weekend we thought things were improving and they sent us home. She lasted 2 nights and then was nauseated and was throwing up. There was blood in her vomit probably from her irritated throat and the throwing up just made it alot worse. She had meds she needed to take orally and she was in tears and just couldn't do it- the pain was too bad- so back we went to Calgary Sunday afternoon.<br />
Because Brynn has always been so positive and kept us all hoping and believing it is crushing to see when she is getting down. I have never felt so helpless in my life and I would do anything to take all her pains on myself and let her be free of it all. She says how lucky everyone is that they get to go to school and be normal and she would do anything to be like them. How that makes my heart break and it's hard not to say- Why Her? She doesn't deserve any of this but then there are alot of kids going through this and none of them deserve it. <br />
Brynn is honestly my HERO! I'm not sure what any of us would do if we were in her situation but she is absolutely not willing to give up- even though she is so sick of living like this. We made it very clear to her that the cancer is becoming resistant again and we don't know if it will respond to anything. She is adamant that she wants to try new chemo and do anything she can- even if it makes her more sick or she has to be in the hospital. Back in October she said she would rather die from chemo than from cancer- that's a pretty profound thing to say at age 13! We continue to HOPE for a response to the new chemo she started last week. We are praying for her pain to be controlled and for her to be able to be home with family and friends. We have amazing doctors and nurses that are taking care of her and they have the same goals we do and will do anything to make it happen. As long as Brynn wants to keep fighting we will be right there with her. We know miracles happen everyday- we experienced our own being able to do that trip. What's to say we won't get another one? We can never give up HOPE<3<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-11692984458164962452013-08-02T09:42:00.000-07:002013-08-02T09:42:14.359-07:00August 2, 2013I can't believe summer is half over! It makes me so sad because I love just having the kids at home and having no schedules or sports right now- just together time! The last few weeks have been both tough and amazing! Brynn has been managing quite well except for some nerve pain that comes and goes. Her back is feeling better but this pain shoots down her right arm and is pretty intense- and then goes as quickly as it came. She is sleeping better the last week or so. For a while we were up with her until anywhere from 2-4am every night. Glad that everyone is getting a little more rest now! We all look less zombish:)<br />
One of the highlights was getting to go to her cousin Raegan's wedding! My brother and part of his family flew from Phoenix and it was great to spend time with them! Raegan looks so beautiful and we are so happy for her and Kalin! Brynn was so excited to go down to our cabin the following Monday after the wedding. My sister and her family had booked time off work and were coming with us. Then the doctors called and wanted us to come to the hospital Tuesday and possible start radiation right away. Brynn was so upset because she was looking forward to our trip so much. We met with them Tuesday and met with radiation as well. They said we would start Thursday for 5 days so since they don't do radiation on weekends it would end on Wednesday. I asked if there was any harm to waiting until Monday and doing it all next week. They said they had to have time to plan it but checked into it. We were so happy when they said we could come earlier Monday to plan and then start later that afternoon and that would work fine! Tender mercies! We left the next day to the cabin with my sisters family. Brynn had alot of pain driving and the first night there but then fully enjoyed the rest of the weekend! We shopped, kayaked, boat and tube rides and just relaxed. We had fires every night, made smores and it was just what she needed to gear her up for the next part of her battle plan. Sometimes the mental break is the most needed thing!<br />
Before we left to go- Brynn was upset that her hair was falling out on the new chemo she was on. It bothered her much more this time after finally growing it back. The first time not one tear was shed. It is quite disturbing to have hair all over your shirt and pillow all the time! We had an incredibly kind sweet girl-my nieces sister in law Kaylee Ralph send me a message a while back and offer to take pictures for us anytime! She had no idea that I am getting obsessed with pictures and what a treasure they are to me! We talked and decided to do them after the cabin and when she was back from holidays. When I saw how much hair Brynn was losing I called her and we didn't know when would work. I called her on the weekend and we were supposed to go to Calgary on Monday and possible be starting radiation. Then Calgary called and said they had to change it to Tuesday and thank goodness Kaylee said let's do them tomorrow (Monday) then! It was a perfect evening and I'm so glad we got them done that night! She did an amazing job and I'm so grateful to her!<br />
Now back to the cabin.... Brynn was in tears when she tried to brush her hair out one morning and a huge clump came out showing her scalp. I had promised her when she first relapsed that I would shave my head if she lost her hair again. I told her whenever she was ready we would do it. Then my sister had said she would shave her head too- so we sat outside at the cabin and had a head shave! There was lots of laughs as Brynn cut off my long ponytail, then cut super short bangs, then a mullet, and finally all of it! It was so nice that a traumatic thing turned into alot of laughing and some big smiles! I was so proud of my sister for doing it too and Brynn loves that the three of us are bald! <br />
Today is her last day of radiation this time around- YAY! This Sunday we are leaving to go to my brother's in Conneticut with Sadie, my sister Julie and her daughter Paige and my mom. I wasn't sure if Brynn and I would be going and bought cancellation insurance but she's feeling well enough and the doctors have given the go ahead and think it will be really good for her! Yet another tender mercy. <br />
We live in such an amazing community. We came home to find the our house and yard and all of main street we live on all tied with purple bows and ribbons in support of Brynn. At the school on the chain link fence is a big Team Brynn sign with a felt pen for every one to sign. This Sunday our ward is having a fast on Brynn's behalf and I don't think people realize how much we feel supported and carried as we carry on and do what we must do. It really gives us the strength to carry on when we have those days where we really don't want to anymore. Thanks everyone from the bottom of our hearts- and please continue to pray for more miracles and tender mercies on our daughter's behalf<3<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-36324153665652583302013-07-11T09:49:00.000-07:002013-07-11T09:49:16.791-07:00July 11, 2013This last month we have had some of our biggest highlights and then some of our lowest lows. It's strange how things happen and it feels like we have come a full circle- I will try to explain! At the end of school this year Brynn wanted very badly to be present at the year end assembly on the very last day of school. Her chemo was scheduled for Calgary that day but they are so accommodating to let us do it in Lethbridge whenever we feel is necessary. We made her appt earlier than usual that day so we could race back for the assembly. As they give the award they go grade by grade. For grade 8 they called the awards and Brynn's name was called for the Citizenship Award- for always being kind to everyone. I had tears well up in my eyes as I remembered us racing back from Brynn's first MRI three years ago when she was just getting diagnosed. We barely made it back before her grade 5 class was called and she won the Citizenship Award then too. This year her brother Kade and cousin Abby received the same award as well.<br />
The week after school was out on June 25th we had tickets to see Taylor Swift in Edmonton. My girls were SOOO excited- she is their absolute favorite singer. Kevin's brother Corb said he would try to get his manager who is friends with Taylor's manager to hook us up with something. I didn't hear any more the month before we went and then Corb called the day of the concert and said we were to go at 4:30 and pick something up from Rexall Place. I thought he must had got her to sign something for the girls so we went to pick it up and they handed me an envelope. We opened it up and it said we were invited to the "Meet and Greet"!!!! The girls could not believe we were going to meet her! It was pretty surreal as they took the three of us into a curtain and we were standing in there alone with Taylor Swift! She was very gracious and even told Brynn she loved her hair. She had no idea that Brynn had been bald and grown her hair out! We were only allowed the one picture that they took of us and she is even more stunning in person!<br />
After the high of the concert we were on our way to have scans in Calgary before returning home. It has took me almost 2 weeks to even write this blog post because I can hardly put it into words. It feels like if I actually write it down then I can't pretend it is all a bad dream. Brynn has been complaining of pain in her shoulder blades lately and so even though we were praying with all that we had- I was scared. Exactly 3 years to the day since we got the horrible phone call with Brynn's diagnosis- we got another call that was worse than any other sucker punch to the stomach that we have received so far. The cancer is in several new areas that it has never been in before. So I feel like here we are- three years later right back to where we started except for this time we are starting to feel burned out. We want to be done- it's hard to keep the fighting spirit up when as Brynn says- I'm just sick of being sick and I just want to be normal! Nothing breaks my heart more. <br />
I'm trying to not get mad because I hate this disease sooo much and it has took so much away from us. It is so sneaky and frustrating! We had good response and you have so much hope- then it becomes resistant and finds somewhere new to go. It hasn't grown back in any of the areas it has been so far- and not in her foot where it all began- so so frustrating! <br />
So here we are - getting our armor back on for battle once again. Brynn said she absolutely wants to keep fighting and I told her she is my hero no matter what. I would understand if she was done but she for sure wants to keep fighting. We will take each day as it comes and enjoy every moment. So grateful that we have summer holidays right now and can just enjoy being together as a family and have no schedules to do whatever we want. Thank you for all your prayers and support. Everyone askes what they can do and really that is the best thing right now! Pray for our little girl<3Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-47146916811874880742013-06-16T22:14:00.001-07:002013-06-16T22:14:08.291-07:00June 16, 2013I can't even believe what the date is as I type it!!! We have had such a crazy busy couple of months and I am truly amazed at how well Brynn continues to do! We finally had the opportunity to do something that Brynn has been begging to do for years now! That is have a litter of puppies....that is why I haven't blogged for so long! Just kidding but it was a very busy time between 4 kids and their sports and activities, 6 puppies, and the store that has been busy. Brynn was so excited to have Suri bred and we were so lucky to have the breeder let us enjoy the puppies at our own home- since she usually keeps them with her until they are sold. Brynn would call at noon since all her core classes were in the morning and ask to come home so she could just hang out with the pups. We had 4 boys and 2 girls and all different colors. Brynn is so responsible and it doesn't wear off with her. She continues to completely take care of her bunny that she got for Christmas and she was so dedicated in cleaning up after the puppies and taking care of them every day. When the breeder took them for their shots it was perfect timing as we had Brynn's surgery that week. She had a lump on her leg that was growing, even though everything else was shrinking. Brynn was just wanting it gone and we were lucky enough to have her same surgeon be available to squeeze her in and do this surgery for her. He knows her well and knew that mentally it was what Brynn needed to do- to just have that lump gone- even if it does grow back - which we are praying does not happen!<br />
Brynn's class was planning on an exchange trip in the fall when she first relapsed so we said we were not going to be able to participate in it. As it grew closer her teacher said she talked to the YMCA and they would be happy to book her and a parent a flight with cancellation insurance in case she was able to go with her class. We were thrilled but not sure if it would be possible. The day she came home from surgery was the day the Toronto kids were coming here for their week. She wanted to hurry and go straight to the school to be there when their bus arrived! I was amazed she didn't want to just go home to bed. She ended up doing most of the activities the whole week they were here. She even wanted to go to Waterton with them for the day. I told her dad would go with her but she probably couldn't stay the whole day because she would be too tired. I couldn't believe my eyes when Kevin texted me a picture of Brynn hiking with the group to the top of Bear's Hump. That is a very steep hike up a mountain in Waterton National Park. She was bound and determined- even with her leg still bandaged from surgery- that she was going to do it- and that she wasn't going to be the last one to the top! She ended up beating about a third of the kids and the teachers were saying they better not here any complaining from anyone else if Brynn was doing it! She truly inspires me!<br />
We have continued doing oral and IV chemo and were waiting to start radiation. We were told it would probably be the end of May. I was sure that we would not be able to go to Toronto- but the radiation Dr didn't have things ready so we were able to go! I went with her and we had so much fun together. We went tree trekking and zip lining one day and I could barely keep up with her. I kept thinking she would be done after this run and then she would be eager to keep going. We went to Toronto one day and went to the Wizard of Oz play-which was amazing! We saw the CN Tower and were able to walk around Kensington Market downtown. We went on a boat ride, saw a cranberry farm, had a school dance and the last day went to Canada's Wonderland. She was able to stay with me at a bed and breakfast since I needed to give her meds and shots. Her temperature was up and down while we were there. We had one trip to emergency with a fever and a few phone calls to Calgary but we were able to stay there and do all the fun things with her class. It really was a miracle the way things all worked out. <br />
Since we have been home we have learned that now radiation is on hold until our next set of scans which are on June 28th. He wants to see if there have been any changes first and then we will make a plan. Brynn was ecstatic when the breeder who had all the puppies presold asked if we would like to be guardians of a second dog for her since she decided to keep one of the males back to breed. Of course we said yes and it has been so fun for the kids. It has been the best "pet therapy" for Brynn and it helps her to keep happy and positive and have fun. She would rather stay home with her puppy then go to a party.... which is saying alot for a teenager!<br />
Brynn had a rough week last week. She was having some abdominal pain and some pain in her lower back. She was panicking and she was starting to say things that she usually doesn't think about. She was scared she was dying and saying even though she knows heaven is real- she is not ready to go there yet. It made my heart literally ache in my chest and I did my best to help her continue to have hope and not give up. We are so grateful that for several days now the pain has been gone and she has been feeling fine again and is just worrying about normal things like finishing her last week of school and her test coming up. She mentioned again how lucky everyone at school are and they don't even know it. She always says she just wants to be normal and feel normal. It's unbelievable that it is coming up 3 years in a few weeks since she was first diagnosed. She has literally grown up from a child to a teenager in the hospital. <br />
It really isn't fair- but I know there are lots of things in life that aren't and we just have to do our best to get through the difficult things we have to face in life. <br />
Last Sunday we had General Conference in church which is when we have many congregations of our church all gather together and have leader come and speak to us. Our Stake President called me and asked if the visiting leader (Seventy) could come and meet us. We were going to be gone to Calgary to Sadie's last basketball tournament and I felt so bad that we wouldn't meet him. The next day he asked if we could come an hour early to church because he still wanted to meet us and Brynn. It was wonderful to sit and talk with him. He visited with Brynn and had some amazing words of wisdom for us. He then joined Kevin in giving Brynn a beautiful Priesthood blessing. After that we went in to the service which was full to the back of the gym. Near the end of the meeting, they said that they were going to ask a few people to come up and share their testimony and say a few words. I was scared to death that he was going to say my name. I was shocked when the first name he said was Brynn Lund. They don't usually do that at church and Brynn was leaning on my shoulder- kind of dozing. I told her they just called her name to come to the pulpit. She stood up and walked right up there and told a bit of her story and then shared a sweet testimony of what she knew to be true. There weren't too many dry eyes in there!<br />
I'm so grateful for the things my children teach me every day. I truly feel blessed in so many ways- even when I wish things were different and we could go back to the way things used to be. I know that our kids come to us to teach us things and my kids have taught me more than I have being their parent. I continue to hope and pray and trust that things are in Heavenly Father's hands and he knows what is best. I will try to keep up on the blog more as we have scans coming up and most exciting of all my girls and I are going to Tayler Swift in Edmonton on June 25th!!! Please keep Brynn in your prayers as we head into scans again soon..... we have to have hope and believe!<br />
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Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-66892021667278943472013-04-06T21:19:00.000-07:002013-04-06T22:32:59.644-07:00April 6, 2013Wow, I can't believe how time flies! We have had an amazing last month or so. Brynn continues to amaze us and seems to be feeling very good. She is at school full time except for chemo days and is thriving. She amazes us with the grades she is getting with all the school she has missed! She was a trooper as we travelled alot to watch basketball games many times during the week from November to March. She always wanted to come and cheer on her sister Sadie- never wanting to miss out on anything. Brynn is sooo excited because something she has wanted for a long time- ever since we had our dog Zoe- is to have a litter of puppies! Well, Suri was bred and is going to have puppies sometime this week! Brynn and the other kids are going to have a blast having the puppies around- even though they won't be ours but the breeders. We are going to have alot of tears I'm afraid when the day comes that they are all gone. It will be a great experience for them though. <br />
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We had scans on March 26th and 27th and were extremely nervous even though Brynn is feeling so good, needing no morphine for pain, and we just about can pretend to be normal except for the pills, shots, and chemo IV once a week:) It is the most unreal feeling watching your child going into all these scans and tests and knowing that you can't change a darn thing- the outcome will be what it will be and you just have to deal with the reality of it. I prayed and prayed in every scan, giving her words of encouragement, joking and laughing together, meanwhile having knots in my stomach. We always have a deal that mom and dad fast along with her- we only eat when she can eat. Usually my stomach is hurting so much from nerves I couldn't eat anything anyways. Right before scans Brynn started worrying about her leg and scared that a lump there was bigger. When Dr. Lewis her oncologist called with the results her fears were confirmed. Everything in every other area was shrinking- some places that were diseased before didn't even show on scans. Everything was very positive except this one area in her leg. We were scared and a little mad- like come on- cut this sweet girl a break already! So now we are waiting to find out what plan of action is next. We are going to Calgary this Monday and meeting with some surgeons to find out what our options are there and then waiting to hear if we are going to add radiation treatments to this area. Nothing breaks my heart more than to have to calm Brynn's worst fears- usually at night in bed. She asks some tough questions and I know she is scared to death. <br />
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Right after scans we were so glad to have Easter break for the kids and we took off to our cabin to get away from it all. It's so nice to be in nature with no internet or cell phones and to just be together, and with no other distractions! <br />
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Brynn said on the way down that she just wanted to cut her leg off. When Brynn first got diagnosed that was what she was scared of the most- having an amputation. Now she is asking for one just to get rid of this disease and live a normal life! Our week away was awesome! We went skiing one day and had such a great time all together and got some great video footage! We had the Jensen family come down there with us and the kids had so much fun together. It was so great to see Brynn and Kaylee just being kids and building forts together and finding a frog down at the beach. One of the highlights of our whole trip was going dog sledding! When I heard about it I knew the kids would absolutely love it and I was right. It was seriously one of the most fun things I have ever done! <br />
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I just want to say again how much everyones support and prayers and words of comfort mean to us. I know some people wonder why we put things on facebook and I am careful what goes on there. Brynn actually asked me to post about her results when we got back from our trip. She really loves reading the comments and she is amazed at how many people care about her. We feel really helpless right now as parents- just waiting and doing whatever the specialists tell us to do. The only thing we can do is pray, be positive, and never stop hoping and believing that miracles do happen every day and we continue to see many blessing poured down on our little family<3<3<3Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-79101290176025034752013-02-21T23:02:00.002-08:002013-02-21T23:02:28.419-08:00February 21, 2013I have been meaning to write about our trip ever since we got back and life has been so crazy busy- a good normal busy that I took for granted before and didn't know if it would be like that again! We have been running to Sadie's basketball games and all the school activities and are so grateful for 4 children that are doing so many good things. <br />
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Our trip to Phoenix was absolutely amazing! My brother Mark and his wife Alanna made so many plans and did so many fun things with us there that Brynn said she felt like it was another "wish trip". We are so grateful that things fell into place and we were able to go. Once again there were many little miracles- Brynn had low counts and was very worried about leaving the country. The doctors said we could check on Monday morning before we flew but the counts would probably be even lower because we had chemo again. We checked anyways and were thrilled when we heard they were on the way up and she wasn't neutrapenic anymore! We flew out that night and worried alot less! While we were there we went to a Phoenix Suns game and got the VIP treatment- went early and got to be down on the floor- sit on the team bench and even met Charles Barkley backstage! We had a private box with lots of food and it was a really fun night for all of us! We swam, went shopping, went to a Phoenix Coyote game in another box seat and Kade even got to ride the Zamboni at the period break! (Brynn was asked to but was too shy!") We are so grateful for that amazing trip and that Brynn was feeling up to going on it. It's been amazing how her chemo treatments have worked out perfectly for our schedules to fit everything in! Her week off in December was the week of Christmas, then her week off in January was Sadie's semester break and we could go to Phoenix, and now she has this week off for family day and teacher convention week so we were able to go down to our cabin in Kalispell. Everyone was going skiing and Brynn didn't think she wanted to ski so I was staying with her. Well, she changed her mind so I bought her a ticket and explained to the lady that she would try but might be tired after one run. Well, she shocked us again as she skiied all afternoon and kept wanting to go again and again. I was skiing behind her at one point- it was beautiful outside and she had her arms out like she was flying. Tears came to my eyes and I said a little prayer of thanks- truly amazed that I was even seeing what I was seeing! Blessings are pouring in! <br />
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We were extremely nervous to get her scan results back and were scared when our oncologist called the next day. We cried together on the phone as he told us that they were amazed how things were shrinking and how much smaller the tumors were. He said that the radiologist reading her scans thought they had done surgery and that was why he couldn't see her one tumor anymore. We don't know which treatment is working or if it's a combination of the two but we are just going to continue doing what we are doing because it is working and she is feeling good. She is such a trooper taking her pills and letting us give her the shots 3 times a week- but she knows things are responding which makes it easier to continue the fight. <br />
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Kevin took Brynn to Nashville again right from Phoenix because flight were so much cheaper than coming back to Canada and flying from here. Her doctor there received her scan results as well and was so thrilled to see how well she is doing and that things are shrinking. We are going to see him in three months again and in the meantime just keep doing the treatments here. The doctors are so excited at how she is doing that they are letting her do some of her treatments in Lethbridge and just come to Calgary once a month. She has literally had no pain the last 3 months so we are now weaning her off her morphine and seeing how she feels. So far she is doing great with that too. <br />
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I know I say this over and over but blessings continue to pour down on this sweet little girl and our whole family and I know that alot of prayers are being said and answered on our behalf. We can never thank everyone enough and we continue to consider each day a blessing and not take the little things for granted!Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-27613332640242249292013-01-13T16:27:00.000-08:002013-01-13T16:59:34.788-08:00January 13, 2013Happy New Year Everyone!!!! As we end 2012 I have so many mixed emotions. Wanting the bad parts of this last year to be over- yet some of our most cherished memories have been in 2012. We continue to talk about our amazing wish trip we had last May on the Disney Cruise and Brynn just said last week that if she could choose a wish again she would go on another Disney Cruise. It's good to know that she has never regret her decision! Also getting sealed in the temple was the biggest highlight we had and will always cherish that memory. As I took down Christmas and our 7 trees (yes 7!!!! I know I'm crazy but it made Brynn happy) I had so many different emotions. I'm always ready to start fresh with a new year and make new resolutions- but this year is a little different. I'm very aware of the up hill battle we have this coming year and although I am full of hope and positive thinking- it's not what I was envisioning. At the same time the highs are higher and the things that usually go unnoticed become much more important and leave an imprint in your memory and heart.<br />
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Last week Brynn had surgery to get a central line (IVAD or port) put back in her chest and get her PICC line taken out that has been giving us trouble. We stayed up at Ronald McDonald House since she had to be at the hospital at 6:30am. Our surgeon who we have come to love was not scheduled for that day but he came anyway to do Brynn's surgery since he has done every procedure she has had and really cares about her. We so appreciated that. The plan was to see how she was after recovery and how her counts were and then to have chemo that day (Wednesday) instead of Thursday instead of staying up there one more night. She took a long time to wake up in recovery- mostly because she never wakes up before 11 let alone 6am! When she finally had some food in her stomach she said- "Okay- tell the nurse I'm ready to go have chemo now!" I just laughed at how she handles things and just accepts what she has to do all the time. We went down to the oncology unit and were surprised at how high her counts were. We were able to have chemo like we hoped and left that afternoon- even got home in time for Kevin to get to Sadie's basketball game! We truly feel like little blessings happen everyday and we just have to recognize them and not just focus on the things we wish we could change. <br />
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Next week is going to be tough as we have our first set of scans since we started treatment in October. On Wednesday we have a PET scan, 2 MRI's and a CT scan. We will be praying hard that the results show some response to the treatments she is receiving. We don't care which treatment is working as long as one of them is! We are so excited that we are going to Phoenix the next Monday on the 21st. Brynn has wanted to go visit my brother and his family since she first got diagnosed two and a half years ago. He has a beautiful home and yard with a pool, tennis court, and two dogs. That is one of the reasons we got the port in so she could do one of her absolutely favorite things which is swimming. They made sure to get it in on time to heal before going to Arizona. Brynn has a week off of treatment the same as Sadie's semester break so we decided to go for it and take the family there for a week. It will be nice to get away and if anything happens our oncologist says he has friends at the Phoenix Children's Hospital. He seems to have friends everywhere but hopefully we don't have to meet them on this trip!<br />
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Today in church we talked alot about trials and the things we have to go through in this life. We read a scripture that basically said that everything we go through is for our good and to give us the experiences we need to help us become more Christ- like. I know that some things we will not know the meaning of on this earth but we have to trust that our Heavenly Father has a plan and that he knows what is best for us. I feel like if our lives were always smooth and free of problems we wouldn't ever develop the empathy we need to help others through similar problems. I wish we could pick and choose the trials we have- and maybe we did- but it's still hard to accept sometimes. As we head into this week of scans we would ask for continued prayers for our sweet little courageous daughter- that we can have the results we are hoping and praying for and that we can have continued peace and comfort as we continue on this unknown journey.Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-20902180235541531412012-12-29T23:33:00.002-08:002012-12-29T23:33:19.303-08:00December 29, 2012I keep telling myself I need to sit down and blog but Brynn has turned into such a night owl that she rarely goes to sleep before 12:30 anymore and when she is awake the last thing I want to be doing is sitting at the computer! She is at her cousin Paige's birthday party right now so it seemed like a good time! We have had alot happen since my last post! Brynn has been doing amazing and keeping us all in good spirits with her good attitude (most of the time) and quick wit! Her pain is completely gone on the lowest dose of morphine which is such a huge blessing! We were not controlling it before on a higher long acting dose before and needing several break through pills throughout the day. She hasn't needed any break throughs in weeks now!<br />
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The biggest highlight we had was that our family was sealed together in the Cardston Alberta Temple on November 17th! It is something that our kids have prayed to happen for years so it was a very special day for all of us. My mom and sister got busy sewing three white dresses for my girls and two of my brothers flew home to be there. It was pretty amazing having our four children walk into the sealing room of this beautiful peaceful place all dressed in white! There wasn't a dry eye there and we all felt so much peace and comfort knowing we will be together for eternity no matter what! <br />
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The day after the temple , Kevin and Brynn and I flew down to Nashville to meet with a Dr that we heard about and contacted. We were intrigued with some alternative treatments he was offering that we could do at home in addition to the chemo. We both felt like it was the right thing to do but were extremely worried to take Brynn that far away from home and the Children's hospital. Once again - prayers were answered and she did great on our 3 night trip. We were able to do some sight seeing and had a nice little vacation together!<br />
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The last month we have been busy just living in the moment and enjoying each day. Brynn has no more pain in her back and is feeling like getting out more and more. Christmas is both her and my favorite time of the year. We went a little crazy this year with decorations and the number of Christmas trees we had- but it made us happy and brought us a smile! We decided to shuffle the kids bedrooms around and move Brynn upstairs- so we got busy painting her room and even had someone give her a dresser! She loves it and is sleeping very well there- too well most mornings- like until almost noon! <br />
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We have had so many amazing things happen this holiday season- once again very humbled and amazed at the generosity of others. We had not one- but two people that did the 12 days of Christmas to our family. The kids and even us parents were so excited each day to get the knock at the door and run to see what would be sitting on our steps! Kevin tried to have our dog catch them but it wasn't until the last day when they revealed themselves that we actually knew who it was. I had guessed so many people but was completely surprised! They will never know how special they made the holidays for us when we needed it the most! We can't wait until next year when we can do the same for someone else! From people surprising us with a tree in our dining room- fully decorated- to Christmas lights put on our trees outside- to anonymous gifts and generous donations to our family we truly have felt so blessed and thank you will never be enough. <br />
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I had prayed and prayed that Brynn would be home for Christmas and not end up in the hospital and things were looking good. We told the kids that they couldn't come up until 8:00 to open presents and they did their usual tradition of all sleeping together in Sadie's room in the basement. Reese came running upstairs at about 7:30 and said " Brynn needs you- she has a nosebleed" I ran downstairs and she was in tears with blood pouring out. I tried to control it for about 10 minutes and decided we better go to emergency. I felt so bad leaving the other 3 while we took off and wondered if we would get home to open presents. My sister came and took them to her house so they weren't alone. When we got there I knew we needed to check her counts and was sure she was low and needing a platelet transfusion which means waiting for blood to be delivered from Lethbridge. Brynn's PIC line in her arm had been giving us trouble for the last 2 or 3 weeks and wouldn't give any blood. I told them they could try but it wasn't working so they would probably have to poke her in the other arm- which Brynn hates. I was shocked when it gave blood immediately- and my eyes filled with tears. It felt like a gift for Brynn so she wouldn't need a poke on Christmas day. Another Christmas miracle came when they gave us our lab report back and her counts were fine!!! No transfusion needed and we could go home! We got home at about 10 o'clock and continued on with our Christmas- feeling even more grateful!<br />
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Even though I am still sad for my little girl that she has to continue her fight- I can't believe how amazing she is and how much she teaches us every day. A year ago she could hardly even swallow a pill anymore and I didn't know if she would even be able to take a chemo pill at home. Now she is taking 15 pills a day- never a problem and she never complains about it. We are giving her heparin in her PIC each day and changing her PIC dressing each week. She gets three other shots a week and handles it all like a rockstar! <br />
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We continue to get sad news of other friends from Calgary- it breaks our hearts and sometimes makes it hard to keep our spirits up- to keep finding the courage and hope to carry on. These other kids have become like family to us and I am sick at the number that are relapsing and not doing well. This disease has to stop- especially in these innocent kids that have not put anything in their bodies to cause any harm. We continue to pray for them and to never give up on the miracles that I know do happen in the world today. These kids deserve it!<br />
Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-18320302773566270022012-11-11T13:00:00.001-08:002012-11-11T13:00:46.664-08:00November 11, 2012Well, our decision was made for us. We were faced with the decision whether to put Brynn on a clinical trial for chemo or traditional treatment. We were definetly leaning towards the trial because it used the same drugs as the traditional but added a new one in addition that was not proven yet. We were not able to start the trial until Monday or Tuesday which concerned Brynn because she just wanted to get going, worried that things were growing and spreading. The one concern the oncologists had was this infection she is fighting from the biopsy that they didn't want to get worse with the trial. We then learned on Friday that she no longer qualified for the trial because of the infection she is recovering from. It was almost a relief that the decision was no longer ours- and the concerns we had with the trial drug were no longer an issue. Brynn was glad we could start chemo yesterday instead of waiting a few more days. One of the biggest concerns Brynn had was the size of the chemo pills that she was going to be taking daily. She has really struggled with swallowing pills and she gets very anxious wondering how big they are and if she is going to be able to get them down. They talk about "tender mercies" and I believe we had one yesterday when they brought the pill in and we were so surprised how small it was. I teared up with relief knowing that she could do it and it wasn't going to be a huge obstacle for her every single day!<br />
She got her IV chemo and took the pill no problem yesterday and then Brynn asked for a pass to get out for a couple hours before her next IV antibiotic. She was feeling great so they gave the okay- she was so excited to just go to the mall a couple block away and get out of the hospital for a bit. When we got there- we were barely there 20 min and she said her head was starting to hurt. I gave her a morphine pill but it did nothing and she was getting worse by the minute. I've never walked so fast pushing the wheelchair as we hurried back to our truck to get her back to the hospital. I called them to let them know she wasn't doing well and we would be back in a minute. She started throwing up in the car and it continued for the next hour. Her head has never hurt so bad and it killed Kevin and I seeing her in so much pain. Her blood pressure was extremely high which they thought was from pain and if they could get enough morphine in her then it would go away. Brynn started asking for the blood pressure medication that she had a few days before- as soon as that was given it was almost instant relief. We were so happy to see her comfortable again. Kevin just held her head in his hands until she knew the pain was gone. <br />
The night was not too bad- still pain in her back that required morphine every few hours but no headache. We said alot of prayers last night and they are trying to figure out why her blood pressure has been going up every other day. We pray for the doctors to be guided in knowing what to do for her so she gets the best care possible. Brynn continues to amaze us with her positive attitude and quick wit. She is always making us laugh and smile and is such an inspiration. Hopefully we will be able to come home in the next few days and then will be making weekly trips to Calgary for IV chemo. We miss the rest of our family so much and can't wait to be home all together again soon!<br />
<br />Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-12673402423013536152012-11-09T18:20:00.003-08:002012-11-09T18:20:43.010-08:00November 9th, 2012I'm having a hard time wanting to write on this blog because it still seems surreal that this turn of events is actually real and not a nightmare. We were able to go home on Halloween day and be with our family. We really needed to regroup and see our other kids as well. Brynn wasn't feeling great but did manage to put her costume on and get driven to a couple of houses. We were in close contact with the pain team in Calgary and it took a couple days to fine tune Brynn's morphine and make sure we were giving the right amount for pain and not too much and making her sleepy. The day after we got home I was concerned that her biopsy sight was a little red around the bandage. We took pictures and showed our doctor and we got her on oral antibiotics right away. By Friday- 2 days later however it looked worse and was an angry red color, very warm to touch and she was sleeping all the time. We took her into emergency and got her on IV antibiotics. We were scheduled to come back to Calgary on Tuesday to get treatment started but unfortunately her infection wasn't cleared up enough yet. They switched her to a stronger antibiotic and she had an allergic reaction to it. The last few days have been rough- she has had a few allergic reactions, 2 blown IV's, a few failed attempts at new IV's and high blood pressure requiring medication. She is getting tired of the endless doctors needing to look at her infection site and a few ultrasounds, echo, ECG and other tests. Right now she is in surgery getting her PIC line put in. The room feels so empty when she isn't in it! She is still in unbelievable good spirits most of the time even though she has been fasting since midnight last night thinking her surgery would be before noon and it ended up not being until 5:30 pm.<br />
One of the hardest things about Brynn relapsing is that she is such a worrier and so smart. She asks so many questions that I have no good answer for and it breaks my heart as a mother not to be able to take all her fears away. She told the doctors she want to get chemo going right away because she is worried it is growing and spreading inside of her. We are supposed to begin either tonight or tomorrow. They will keep us here through the weekend to keep fighting this infection and then hopefully we will be home Tuesday or Wednesday for a little while. Our kids at home are having a hard time- especially Sadie. She is so strong and doesn't want to make any of this about her but I know she is keeping it all inside and it's hard to hide it all the time. Her and Brynn have been so close and decided to share a room again when Brynn was done treatments last year. She is such great big sister and I'm so glad for the special bond they share. <br />
Brynn just returned from surgery and is having some back pain. Time to go be with my baby.... I'll put up more pics when I'm back and on my home computer.Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-49270872593172618802012-10-29T23:13:00.000-07:002012-10-29T23:13:04.981-07:00October 29,2012Today was THE hardest day of my life. I was hoping to never post on this blog again- it would be to remember Brynn's treatments and look back at it when we were back to normal life. Brynn has been done treatment for a year now and has not has as much as a cold. She has dove back into everything she missed while in treatment- 4H, basketball, volleyball, swim club, baton lessons, piano lessons and much more. We recently lost 2 close friends from the hospital and I was having a really hard time not feeling guilty that Brynn was doing so well. That all changed so quickly that I wasn't at all prepared. <br />
Last Friday we were at a very close friends funeral when Brynn complained that her back was sore. She is playing volleyball right now so that was my first thought. Also when Brynn was diagnosed my back was terribly sore and was told that when you are stressed or mourning you carry it all in the back- that made sense with what she was going through. When it was still sore 2 days later I decided we better check it out and see if she had a kidney infection or something. It quickly changed to her throwing up ( she had friends with the flu as well) and then the pain left her back and moved to the right side of her lower stomach. I took her in to the hospital a couple more times trying to figure out what was wrong. Calgary decided to do a PET scan and we waited for the results of that. Everyone from Taber and Calgary hospital felt sure that it was either the start of her period or kidney stones that were causing the pain. We came up to Calgary yesterday and this morning I went in rounds to hear what the dr's were deciding to do. I was completly blind-sided when they said there were multiple hot spots that showed up in the scan and that it was very worrisome that she was relapsing. I can honestly say that today has been worse than the day she was first diagnosed. I feel angry and frustrated that things were going so well and that we had no signs or symptoms earlier and that things could change so quickly for us. I have felt nauseated all day with the news- yet needing to be strong and answer all of Brynn's tough questions the best I can. All I know is that she is one amazing kid that has touched so many lives and continues to be an example of strength and courage to me. <br />
Tomorrow we have surgery and figure things out so we can come up with a game plan with the team of oncologists. We have amazing support from family and friends and feel the prayers being offered on Brynn's behalf. Please continue to pray for her- I am going to try to update regularly on this blog that I guess isn't done it's story yet....Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-2881598379865785422012-05-06T22:07:00.001-07:002012-05-06T22:07:38.853-07:00May 2012 Disney Cruise- Here We Come!!!!I have had good intentions to write on the blog for a while now- but things have been so crazy since opening our store in March that I literally have not had time to sit and do any personal things on the computer! We have kids involved in so many activities that we are either running them or running to the store. It has been a different busy than I am used to- but like our nurse said- it has definitely helped keep my mind occupied with something other than the next scans! <br />
Brynn has been doing amazing! She has got right back into a normal 12 year old life! She is doing great in school- missing a year and a half of being in the classroom has not seemed to hurt her a bit! She worried about her grades all the time but usually surprised us with all her great marks! She decided to go into baton lessons with her friends and has been enjoying twirling at home all the time! We usually have to tell her to put it away as she is spinning it by our heads constantly and she likes our high ceilings in the living room where she can throw it in the air! She decided to join the club basketball team just this spring and to go in a tournament that was in Lethbridge last weekend. The last time Brynn played basketball in grade 5 she was so timid and shy on the court she looked like the last thing she wanted was to have the ball passed to her. This time she shocked us all with her speed and aggression. I guess everything she has been through has put some spunk in her! She stole the ball away quite a few times and even though she was pretty tired at the end- she had a big smile and was so glad to be on the team with her friends. <br />
This past Tuesday she began swim club again! She was on the swim team when she was diagnosed and they have been so supportive throughout treatment. They told us they would save a spot for her whenever she could come back. She was so excited because swimming is probably her favorite sport and she only went a couple times over the past 18 months. Her coach said how awesome it was to have her back and how smooth her stroke is still. She is excited to go in some swim meets over the next few months!<br />
We are so excited that in 4 sleeps we are leaving on our trip with the Children's Wish Foundation! Brynn finally decided on a Disney Cruise! She had a few trips that she was deciding between but when we received the DVD on the Disney Cruise she was so excited and knew that was what she wanted to do! It is going to be so nice to get away as a family and we are really looking forward to making some amazing memories! They are so extremely generous- they sent us a big box full of things and even a new camera for us for the trip! It will be amazing!!!<br />
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The end of the month after our trip is time for scans again. We are trying not to think about it constantly and just keep praying and having faith. We hear of trials others are having and we know we are not the only ones going through things. We feel very fortunate and never forget to count the blessings we have received. We continue to pray for our friends that are struggling or are needing comfort- we love you guys! So we will go and relax and enjoy this trip of a lifetime- and then go to our scans with optimism and holding our breath.Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-43766369196352191152012-03-04T21:36:00.015-08:002012-03-04T23:16:06.604-08:00March 4, 2012<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN5K_8lCmrAYA6_8cd46gV4PCYhMbDQs91TvX7FIDyOQ0nui7GyQgSPuIOWw6HVRRTMMOogrTtGlgs1fv8FHuRbS1zVgyhqffF59M6ea0lqwvVWKEUh0wm8PZY6HCbqpvtjh7NRVaCl_Jc/s1600/023.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN5K_8lCmrAYA6_8cd46gV4PCYhMbDQs91TvX7FIDyOQ0nui7GyQgSPuIOWw6HVRRTMMOogrTtGlgs1fv8FHuRbS1zVgyhqffF59M6ea0lqwvVWKEUh0wm8PZY6HCbqpvtjh7NRVaCl_Jc/s320/023.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd0Fg53DXegXipMPmRldensYTBlKXmHLQpNNjh5aB4hIFizQa6T_kwRM5Jf3nceMZajvWVrxs5nsYhdGVS-I5g_062Ru2DqoBXUdAS1ZzsqENDIQt0MPxuKBMdI67v6BepF0s2nS0Seltv/s1600/087.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd0Fg53DXegXipMPmRldensYTBlKXmHLQpNNjh5aB4hIFizQa6T_kwRM5Jf3nceMZajvWVrxs5nsYhdGVS-I5g_062Ru2DqoBXUdAS1ZzsqENDIQt0MPxuKBMdI67v6BepF0s2nS0Seltv/s320/087.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>I'm officially the worst blogger ever! I can't believe how busy I feel and how little time I seem to have to sit down at the computer! I would never use the Internet period if it wasn't for my iphone! We are in the process of opening a franchise in Lethbridge and Brynn's nurses said it would be great for me to keep my mind on something else but getting it started is definitely busy. We had such an amazing Christmas with Brynn being healthy and home! We had the privilege of being asked to do the live nativity that is held outdoors each year! It was a very special experience for our family and really set the tone for Christmas and remembering the birth of the Savior and focusing what the true meaning is. Brynn was so excited that there would be real animals at it and said she didn't care what part she played as long as she could be with an animal! They chose her to be the stable boy and she was thrilled to be the one to hold the donkey for Mary and Joseph and lead it away when they reached the stable. A few times I was worried that her little 75 pound body couldn't handle the donkey but Brynn had treats she brought in her pocket and did a great job! <br />
In January we lost one of most dear friends that we met from the hospital and Ronald McDonald House. We had known for a few months that it was a possibility but we just kept praying for a miracle for this special little family. Brynn met Charlotte the first week we started treatment and there was an instant connection between them. I can honestly say that the last few months since finishing treatment and returning to home and what is supposed to be "normal" life again- has been the most emotional time since she got diagnosed. We have lost 5 friends from the oncology unit since September and that really takes a toll on you emotionally. Not only on me but on poor Brynn who is such a smart, thoughtful girl who has lots of valid questions for a mom that has very few answers. Our hearts felt literally broken for these families and we feel so helpless but continue to pray for comfort and healing and that they can know they will see these sweet children again.<br />
In February we were once again invited to participate in the Radiothon for the Children's Hospital and it was such a treat for our family. We hadn't been there for over 2 months and were excited to see some of our friends and nurses that have become our extended family. I had given a poem that Sadie had written for school to one of the nurses before Christmas and it had been passed on to the Hospital Foundation. They asked Sadie to read it on the radio (much to her dismay) but she did it and had us all in tears. I'm so glad her teacher told me about it and gave me a copy since my daughter hadn't said anything about it. They were asked to write a quick poem in 5 minutes about something that means something to them. What an amazing girl- I have to say! It goes like this....<br />
<br />
And I'll never forget the bright colored walls<br />
it all looked so joyful and fun<br />
is this really a hospital? I thought to myself<br />
but the story had only begun<br />
<br />
And I'll never forget how my heart sank<br />
as we strode down the oncology hall<br />
the way you can here young patients crying<br />
and my sister would experience this all?<br />
<br />
And I'll never forget Brynn's hospital room,<br />
her frail body sprawled on her bed<br />
I always felt a little sad being there<br />
when would her hard year end?<br />
<br />
And I'll never forget how my point of view changed<br />
this place was here to save lives<br />
people there became like your family<br />
and you help other children who cry<br />
<br />
And I'll never forget my young sister's face<br />
when her trial with cancer was through<br />
this place is now our second home<br />
Children's Hospital I owe it to you.<br />
<br />
I have to say I was in shock when I first read it- that she wrote it in such a short time and that she would write about this subject at all at school. We aren't sure where she got this talent from?<br />
<br />
The end of February- actually on my birthday the 27th we had our scans again. I couldn't believe how quickly 3 months went by! I felt very anxious but fasted the day before and knew alot of prayers were being said on Brynn's behalf. I felt so good when we had our appt in clinic at first and the doctor said they considered her cured! I felt very optimistic since she looks so good and she seems to be feeling pretty much normal. After that we went to her MRI and I assumed they were doing her foot and abdomen since that's what we did last time. She reacted to the CT contrast so they decided they would only do MRI's from then on. When they only scanned her foot it had me a little worried and then in her hour long bone scan afterward, they said they were done and then took more pictures of her foot at the request of the radiologist. I reassured Brynn that it was no big deal but Kevin saw the look on my face- I hide my emotions so well! On the way out of the hospital we ran into some friends we haven't seen for quite a while that were done treatment. I gave the mom a hug and asked how they were doing when I saw the tears in her eyes and she answered-Not good! I felt sick the whole way home and could hardly sleep that night! I called the next day and they said they could arrange another MRI if I was going to be losing sleep over it until the next scans in May. They are so good to understand the anxiety of a mother and are so willing to go above and beyond. We did recieve the good news last week that her scans are all clear! We believed they would be but it is still wonderful to hear the words!<br />
<br />
I have to say how grateful I am to be home as a family again and to be able to see all my children together- even though I didn't remember how busy I was before until I came home from the hospital! We continue to have so much support and love for our family and Brynn was so thrilled to return to school in January and to be with her class again! They had a surprise party for her and sang a song to welcome her back! She has beautiful downy soft hair and her glow and contagious smile are as bright as ever- she never did lose that! So good to see her feeling like a normal kid again and not taking a single thing for granted! I'm trying to be like her and not slip into the trap of not appreciating every single blessing we have:)<br />
<a name='more'></a>Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-6790227412732579502011-11-29T21:02:00.000-08:002011-11-29T21:45:15.813-08:00November 2011 Clear Scans and Port Removal!!!!Well- once again I have gone a month without writing on the blog. I was told by a few people lately how long it's been and I don't know why I can't seem to find the time. We have had an awesome past few weeks and I'm amazed how much busier it is being home with 4 kids than being in the hospital with one! We have had a few colds and sicknesses go through our family but Brynn hasn't been one of them and she hasn't had one fever since we left the hospital in September! We are so grateful for that and continue to feel the prayers of so many.<br />
I'll fill you in on our lives this last month- She was able to go to her first sock hop at the school for Halloween and trick or treating too. She continues to train our puppy and that has been a great thing to keep her from missing Zoe too much- still doesn't fill the void though! We have a tutor coming to our house everyday and doing school work with Brynn. She is doing amazing and taking the same tests as her classmates. Her teacher is so surprised that she is getting in the 90% range on her tests and says she is at the top of her class! We are so glad that she is able to keep up with her schoolwork and she looks forward to joining her class after Christmas! Two weeks ago Brynn came to us and said she wanted to do 4H and get a calf! She talked us into it- had some very good arguments- and we went to buy her one. The friend we were buying the calf from said they really shouldn't be alone or they might quit eating so we decided to buy two and let Sadie do it with her. Our neighbors were kind enough to offer their barn across the street and their 12 year old daughter joined 4H as well. Brynn is loving the responsibility and going over to feed the calves twice a day. She loves all animals so much and knows what we do at the end of 4H when we sell the steer and what it is used for. I'm sure there are going to still be alot of tears when the show and sale come!<br />
We had all her scans 2 weeks ago including a PET scan which is very microscopic and scans your whole body. I was so nervous as this was our first scans since we finished treatment and her body is done with the chemo treatments. They said her MRI, Bone scan and CT were all good but we had to wait a few days to find out her PET scan results. We were waiting for the phone call and didn't hear anything so I started thinking that they didn't want to call because the news wasn't good. Finally the next day I couldn't stand it anymore and called and they said our nurse was sick and that was why she hadn't called but they would check and see if the results were back. That was the longest few minutes of silence on the phone as I waited and they read the results to me. They were all clear and there was no signs of anything on the PET scan!!!!!! I started crying and so did the nurse! Then Brynn saw me and said "Oh no!" I quickly told her they were happy tears and everything was good! It was honestly the best gift we could have recieved and we felt so humbled that our prayers had been answered. Now we just have to go through that every 3 months for the next two years! At least we can relax and enjoy Christmas this year and just live in the now! Right now I have a healthy happy daughter and we are going to have the best Christmas and be home for the whole month of December! That is something that our nurse JoJo taught me- that each day you just live in the moment and don't look to far ahead. It can be a hard thing to do but you sure enjoy life more when you aren't living in tomorrow!<br />
Last night we went as a family to the Christmas Carol play with the kids cancer foundation at the Max Bell Theatre here in Calgary. It was such an amazing performance and the kids had so much fun. It was good for Sadie and Brynn to see some of their friends from Kids Cancer Camp that they met in July. What a fun night and a great tradition to do every year! At home we have a church nativity pageant that we always attend and my mom received a call asking if her family ( which includes my brother and sister's family as well as mine) would be the actors for the pageant this year! The kids are very excited and Brynn says she just wants to be where the animals are -so we think she is going to be the stable boy who takes care of the donkey. We will make sure to get pictures and put them on here!<br />
We have a very exciting milestone in the morning! Brynn gets her IVAD taken out that she has had in her chest for the last 16 months! This is one surgery she is excited for and Dr. Steve said he would even save it for her to take home if she wanted! So exciting:)<br />
Well, I will see if I can get on here before Christmas again-I apologize to those who follow this blog for how little I post on it and how random and jumbled my thoughts are when I finally get around to typing late at night when I am so tired! We continue to pray for our friends who are struggling and haven't received as good of news as we have- we want them to know how much we love them and they are always in our thoughts!Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-88838775096428589182011-10-27T22:03:00.000-07:002011-10-27T22:15:37.119-07:00October 2011<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie3fJYB0CUX-f8bZVNjL_wYtxZJixYin-g1JxtmI-atARFER7qALNoOm2noaRFscjkEz9aSrAUixZ45SPA-YlTlY_kRIRgY03Gjsmv2bn2sbIxkCKshL5zPwj7tfKpNo5FqSZ0QEOasUGw/s1600/108.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240px" ida="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie3fJYB0CUX-f8bZVNjL_wYtxZJixYin-g1JxtmI-atARFER7qALNoOm2noaRFscjkEz9aSrAUixZ45SPA-YlTlY_kRIRgY03Gjsmv2bn2sbIxkCKshL5zPwj7tfKpNo5FqSZ0QEOasUGw/s320/108.JPG" width="320px" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinVE5J79int2uz8OnRJjay4bUobXWZrA1kNElWO_m2JkM6So7C4g5iJQ-z6y4GMVZMF650yv0rclIla4EuD1Y2Om2hHEQexrp9pJTjiP5jh6wwdSfa8JiBmDdKsJZGlK28sUo02DVQyMGh/s1600/IMG_2970.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320px" ida="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinVE5J79int2uz8OnRJjay4bUobXWZrA1kNElWO_m2JkM6So7C4g5iJQ-z6y4GMVZMF650yv0rclIla4EuD1Y2Om2hHEQexrp9pJTjiP5jh6wwdSfa8JiBmDdKsJZGlK28sUo02DVQyMGh/s320/IMG_2970.JPG" width="272px" /></a></div>Once again time flies and I haven't gotten around to the blog for a while. It's amazing how much busier I am at home with four kids rather than in Calgary with one!!! We have all been home for a month now and it's so nice to feel like we can be together like a normal family again! I don't know that we will ever be NORMAL- but you know what I mean! After my last posting we had tragedy strike again. As you all know- Brynn is a huge animal lover and her golden retriever Zoe that was given to her by our amazing friends- was her absolute best friend and kindred spirit! We had posters all over her hospital door and every nurse and oncologist knew about Brynn's dog and that she couldn't wait to get home to be with her. Well, on September 14th when Brynn was still recovering from her transplant in the hospital- Kevin called me very upset on the phone. I had just got out of rounds with the doctors about 15 minutes before and they asked if there was anything they could do to help Brynn feel better. I jokingly told them- let her dog come stay here with her! So when Kevin said the words- something is wrong with Zoe- I just took her to the vet- I was in shock. She had gotten into antifreeze somewhere at one of our neighbors and had lost mobility so Kevin took her in. Everyone knows Kevin can be tight with money- but he was crying and told the vet- this is my sick daughters dog and I don't care what it costs- you have to save her! They put her on IV and I didn't tell Brynn why I was upset because I didn't think she could handle worrying about her. I had everyone as well as myself praying for Brynn's dog to make it and be okay. I thought there is no way Heavenly Father won't heal this dog. A couple of days later we heard that she was not responding and her organs were shutting down. I broke down in the hall and didn't know how I was ever going to tell Brynn. The doctors debated if it would be good or bad for Brynn to know right now. I knew she always regret not seeing her. They decided to give her a pass to go home for a few hours to say goodbye. I was so scared and said a prayer before I told her. Brynn was soooo sad but once again amazed me at how strong she is and how she was able to handle losing her dog when she felt horrible herself. She had a feeding tube and they took her off IV's but we had to put fluids and meds through her feeding tube every hour for her to be away from the hospital. That was a very hard night and I will never forget how Zoe perked up and layed there wagging her tail while Brynn cried on her. She was an amazing dog and she knew Brynn was sick and she was there for her whenever she needed her. I was almost more mad that this could happen with all Brynn was going through than sad. My shortsightedness changed when the next day we learned that our dear friend Grant had passed away at the hospital. His mom had become one of my closest friends in such a short time and my heart physically hurt for her and it made me realize that Heavenly Father was blessing me and I need to remember that Brynn was still here and I need to cherish that and not be mad that Zoe was taken from us. We went back to the hospital the next morning and got through the next week before Brynn was released. She came home weighing less than ever before. She had lost a total of 25lbs since diagnosis and they really did not want her to lose anymore. She came home with a feeding tube for her meds and it was very difficult to eat or drink for a while. Her appetite was gone and her throat still hurt from all the mucousitis she had. When they took the feeding tube out a couple weeks later she started eating better and better and now it's close to normal. Her weight is slowly increasing and she is getting more energy all the time. She started school with a tutor at our home last week and is amazing us with how well she is doing. We had many offers to get her a new dog. People are sooo generous and I didn't know when Brynn would be ready or if she would want another golden retriever. Ronald McDonald house had gotten a labradoodle puppy in the summer and we spent alot of time with it when we were there. Brynn mentioned that she might like that so it didn't look just like Zoe- and immediately the phone calls started happening as people were trying to find one for her. We ended up getting one from another very generous person who breeds them and we have a 5 month old carmel colored labradoodle we named Suri. Brynn and I still shed alot of tears over Zoe and Brynn being the softhearted girl she is worried that Zoe would think we had replaced her already. I assured her Zoe would be thrilled she had someone to take care of her and make her smile. Our friends that gave Zoe to us said that they think Zoe was here to get Brynn through treatment and as soon as she was done said you can take me instead of her! As you can imagine I'm crying right now even typing that. We will forever be grateful to them for letting us have her in our life and Brynn's even though it was brief. We are home now getting bloodwork in Taber every Monday and don't go to Calgary until November 14th for scans. I told the doctors I'm almost more scared now that we are done treatment and getting checked every 3 months. They assure me it is normal but I don't know when it gets better. We just have to live in the moment and have faith. We have done all we can do physically and Brynn's little body has been through so much. We have had clear scans since last January and just keep praying constantly that they stay that way! It's funny how it's so good to be home and enjoy every moment with my family- yet think about and miss our family up at the hospital too. There are so many people we pray for everyday and worry about besides our own daughter. We feel so blessed to have gotten to know so many amazing kids, families, nurses and doctors up there. If there is anything I would say to everyone with healthy kids, it's enjoy all the little things everyday. Stopping your busy life to jump on the trampoline or play with them. It's easy to get distracted by so much going on all the time- but it's so special to spend your time on what's really important!!!!:)Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-7580051507320894652011-09-13T12:16:00.000-07:002011-09-13T12:16:31.466-07:00September 2011-High Dose Chemo and Stem Cell RescueHere I am sitting by my sleepy girl and can't believe I haven't written on the blog yet. Today we are on day +13 of transplant which means it is 13 days after she got her stem cells. We were admitted on August 24th and started high dose chemo on the 25th. She first had 3 days of Thiotepa which is excreted out of your pores of your skin so you have to bath really well every 6 hours around the clock for 4 days straight. She was such a trooper (as always) and never complained once as we woke her at midnight and 6am to put her in the bathtub and scrub her from head to toe. After that she had 2 days of another drug- Melfalan and then she had a rest day before day zero- Stem cell day!!! Both chemos were high dose- they said 10-12 times stronger than anything she has received so far. Day zero Brynn once again amazed everyone as she got 2 bags of stem cells and you can feel nauseated or tightness in your throat but she sailed through it no problem. They told us her counts might not come up for 10-14 days after. She started getting mucousitis and was hooked up to a morphine pump to control the pain in her throat and mouth. On day +5 we were so excited when her WBC were 0.1! We told Dr. Lewis and he said I'm not jumping for joy yet- they could still go back down to 0. The next day they were 0.3 and the day after that 1.0!!!! I told him " I NOW want to see the happy dance!!!!" The very sad news what our friend Joey who had been battling for about 5 years went to ICU and passed away on Sunday night. That really shook us up and Brynn was very quiet and sad for days. She was getting cramps, nausea, and diarrhea after her counts started coming up. She was down which is not like her at all and started saying and asking hard questions that I didn't have answers for. Yesterday was Joey's funeral and Kevin had gone home to the other kids so I wasn't able to go- but we love their family and feel privileged to have known Joey. We are just taking things day by day now and the cramps and diarrhea are gone (including bloody stools which scared Brynn and us) She still is nauseated and it's a battle for her to try to eat and drink things and keep them down. She has done amazing they say and this is all normal- it takes a while for the appetite to return. We just take each day and try to eat a little more than the day before. Hopefully we will get to Ronald McDonald House later this week and then home in another week or so. We feel every ones prayers on Brynn's behalf and know that our Heavenly Father is very aware of her and her needs. We see little miracles happening every day!Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2303869554743117709.post-29791793735377914362011-08-21T13:10:00.000-07:002011-08-21T13:10:32.416-07:00August 2011I can't believe how time has flown by this summer! I thought when we were home more I would be able to keep up better with this blog and allot of other things! We have had more time between treatments then we ever have this past year and Brynn has done remarkably well. She hasn't had a fever since Easter Sunday so that has also been a nice break for us. The last few months of chemo have just been overnight or a few minute infusion in Lethbridge. Brynn has been able to go to Waterton, ride her bike and scooter around, swim in our pool in the backyard and just be a normal kid. We were able to go out to Cranbrook and stay with Kevin's sister and visit little Charlotte and her family. We pray for them daily- many times- and sooo enjoyed our visit and seeing them and well she is doing! Brynn went to Kid's Cancer Camp with her sister Sadie at the beginning of August. We postponed her chemo a week so they could go together. Unfortunately Brynn didn't have as good of a time as we all thought she would. Sadie had a blast- but Brynn wasn't with her age group and was quite homesick. We didn't realize as we tearfully said goodbye that we wouldn't be able to talk to her later in the week when we called to check on her. We were told she was fine and happy but we were not allowed to talk to her. They don't know our Brynn though- and how she never complains and will pretend like everything is all right even if it's not! We might try the family camp next year with our whole family! When Brynn returned from camp we went right to the hospital to do the overnight chemo they rescheduled for us. To our surprise her counts had dropped too low to go ahead with it. She had been off GCSF for too long and her bone marrow was getting worn out from a whole year of treatment. Brynn was quite devastated when they said we might not be able to finish her 51 treatment schedule. They asked us to come back in a few days and have a meeting with the oncologists. We came home and had a family fast that the doctors would know what to do and make the right decision for Brynn. When we went and met with them they said their recommendation was to scrap the last few weeks of treatment and go right to high dose- which is an extra that is 10-12 times stronger than anything she has had- and that would more than make up for any missed treatments. Plus she had some easier chemos left to do. We felt very reassured and good about their decision. We really felt that they had decided what was best and felt good to go ahead with their recommendation. So hear we are- we had tests and scans all last week to prepare for high dose which we begin in a few days. The blessings seem to keep pouring in as we received good news on all her tests and scans so far- everything looks clear and she is in remission. One of her tests that checks her kidney function came back with a count of 28 when her last one a few months ago was 110. We became concerned that her kidneys were only working at 1/4 of what they were and one doctor was saying we might have to lower her high dose accordingly. As we were stewing about this but not telling her- the doctor came back and said he went and checked because he thought something wasn't right and it was a typo - it was actually 128 which is normal and better than last time. Tears of relief came as we received this good news! Today our town and both wards of our church are fasting and praying for Brynn as she starts high dose this week. They have told us what to expect for side effects and it's going to be a tough month up in Calgary- but we know she can get through it and we will receive the help we need to get through it. She looks so great right now- hair is growing back- color in her face(actually a bit of a tan!) and she feels so good- it's hard to think we are going to knock her down and make her quite sick again. But the end is near and we are hopeful that the high dose will be worth it. Thank you all again- you have no idea how much support and strength we feel as we carry on. We are truly blessed through our trials!Christy Lundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05048434621207387192noreply@blogger.com1